Today like 10 minutes ago in class the profs were confronted. I wasn't even involved and I was almost in tears. When it comes to people getting all hot and bothered about pretty much anything I have a really hard time with it. I have problems with anxiety and just being around a situation like that makes me feel sick.
I am not upset with anyone and I am not just saying that either I really am not upset by anything in particular that was said or any answers that were given I just am upset. Thom talked to me after and I know I should be learning but in all seriousness I am going to be distracted by the rest of the day. Confrontation makes me so upset. I am frantically thinking about ways that I am learning from that painfully awkward situation and once again I am just feeling one way. Upset. It sounds so dramatic but I was just about ready to get up and leave in the middle of that.
Each time I find myself in a situation similar to that one I simply get upset. As soon as Justin started talking I knew how I was going to react. Sometimes it's as simple as the tone of someones voice I just know its coming.
I am most troubled I think by the fact that this course is about personal learning and not just academic stuff. I am not trying to say that I don't want to learn about myself I just don't feel the need to do that in front of my first year university class.
If I am asked to learn about pirates I'll do it. I am a people pleaser. I always have been I always will be. Confrontation even an isolated incident effectively ruins my day and makes me want to leave and go home.
I apologize if it made you upset. It was not my intention to personally effect you. However, I will assume that there may be more to come, not nessisarily from me.
ReplyDeleteJustin, thank you for your apology but I promise the way I reacted wasn't your fault. I was upset because of the situation not because of what was said or who said it. I should actually be thanking you, you taught me something important about myself that day. I feel better equipped to handle this if and when it happens again.
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