'tis the inquiry season

So I suck at posting learning journals, whatever I'm over it. Tis the season to do some big honking inquiries on some huge atrocities throughout mankind. I am in the decision to bomb Hiroshima group and I feel like were doing alright. I am a little concerned with short amount of time that we have to complete this but I know that we can pull it together in the end.

Hiroshima

So this week in Truth in Society we were split up into Feasibility Study groups. My group is focusing on the decision to drop the bomb on Hiroshima and I want to see it through to the inquiry. I am stoked I have been taking this very seriously and for good reason. I have been at the library and doing hours of reading and writing making sure this topic can with stand an inquiry I am going to be very disappointed if I get moved to another group because I feel like I have a lot to offer the Hiroshima inquiry like in the way that I have passion and interest in the subject. Seeing the way that the call was made makes me SO angry it was a demonstration to the USSR and it was disgusting. I am horrified that President Truman thought this was morally sound. I am still in the early phases of my research but from what I can tell my biggest challenge will be remaining unbiased. I'll try my best. I am really looking forward to hearing everyones Feasibility Reports.

Occasions

I just wanted to point out that I have three occasions done already this semester :D Who's stoked? I believe that would be me.

And here we go

This week was our last week of the separate sessions, and I am pretty bummed out. I really take a lot from the separate subjects. I like the structure it gives the day I wish we did them for longer. I am really loving Journalism in particular. I the documentary and article about the falling man were so powerful emotionally and communicatively. I love seeing the difference between a horrifying image from North America and one from Vietnam, Haiti, or any where else far away. I still even since September I cannot understand why north Americans (myself included) think its OK to put ourselves above people from a foreign area like what are we thinking?! I don't think that seeing someone pulled from the rumble of a level seven earthquake is as horrifying as seeing someone fall 106 stories to their death. What is wrong with the culture I have been marinating in?? Why do I think this way? And how can I fix it??

Another year another chance to discover

So far this year in Aquinas I have done three things. One do my homework. Two learn more than I did in all of last semester. And three forget to post my blog. Yay me.

Russ showed me something that I didn't ever expect the learn. I am effectively stoked. He talked to us about conversations in pieces of writing, and identifying what an author is trying to say through the language they used, the references in their texts, how they introduce the reference how they proceed them. None of this has ever crossed my mind, and now that I am looking for it two things are happening: one it is taking me A LONG time to read anything, and two I had no idea that writers were so intensely brilliant and I have been missing out on it for eighteen years. Well no more and its all thanks to the enlightening Professor Russ Hunt.

I would like to formally give a few shout outs to Eric. Not only am I overjoyed that he stayed in Aquinas for this semester I am also very grateful. He teaches me things because of his unique perspectives and fearless approach to pretty much everything we talk about, and I love it. Another to Jonah wow to be a Quaker in our Religious Studies class thats got to be an incredibly confusing and enlightening educational adventure. I love reading his reports for anything they are not only pretty funny but they offer something great to the table a fresh perspective.

Journalism has been intense as all get out this semester. I love it, and hate it all at the same time. We are learning a lot and I love that. I like that we are learning about all the major human atrocities that I have always just heard about or known of but never actually taken the time to research them. The lectures are well organized, informative, and provide a wonderful foundation for the movies that they transition into at the end of everyday. I love the way that class is set up and I am learning not only facts but how to deliver them in a way that the general public can respond to.

Religious Studies is pretty grand. I just hate how it tricks me so much. I always take the articles SO seriously and they end up being Nacerima all over again. Ugh.

What I am learning

I am learning in Aquinas especially this week that learning is miserable. It includes trial and error and erasing and re-doing and realization. Learning in Aquinas seems to be about a certain level of responsibility. I am attempting to adjust to these new standards. And the tricky thing is that they are not that tricky at all I am just realizing that learning is not something I did before I just acquired a certain level of knowledge and spewed it back up in the form of a paper. Learning is about doing something in a way that challenges you. Learning for me lately has been about getting it wrong and I am having hard time seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.

But at the same time I have a hard time believing that we are doing this course and not learn anything. I now know that I do my best learning outside of the classroom. And I feel like if I want to learn that I will because the best way to figure something out is to do it yourself.

This might be totally off beat but I don`t think that it is. Aquinas is kind of like dancing, when you just let the person who knows what they are doing lead you will be fine and maybe even have a good time.

Confrontation

I hate confrontation. I am not even kidding it makes me really really upset.

Today like 10 minutes ago in class the profs were confronted. I wasn't even involved and I was almost in tears. When it comes to people getting all hot and bothered about pretty much anything I have a really hard time with it. I have problems with anxiety and just being around a situation like that makes me feel sick.

I am not upset with anyone and I am not just saying that either I really am not upset by anything in particular that was said or any answers that were given I just am upset. Thom talked to me after and I know I should be learning but in all seriousness I am going to be distracted by the rest of the day. Confrontation makes me so upset. I am frantically thinking about ways that I am learning from that painfully awkward situation and once again I am just feeling one way. Upset. It sounds so dramatic but I was just about ready to get up and leave in the middle of that.

Each time I find myself in a situation similar to that one I simply get upset. As soon as Justin started talking I knew how I was going to react. Sometimes it's as simple as the tone of someones voice I just know its coming.

I am most troubled I think by the fact that this course is about personal learning and not just academic stuff. I am not trying to say that I don't want to learn about myself I just don't feel the need to do that in front of my first year university class.

If I am asked to learn about pirates I'll do it. I am a people pleaser. I always have been I always will be. Confrontation even an isolated incident effectively ruins my day and makes me want to leave and go home.